they say we are world changers
destined for greatness
we have the earth stretched before us
and the wind at our backs.
nothing is unattainable
so everything should be seized
no holding back, they say
make a difference
shine
step out and become
what you were meant to be.

they ask where we're going
what our plans are
what we've accomplished
and when we don't answer quickly
they tell us
all the things we've tried to forget
how we've got plenty of time to figure it out
(so why do you keep asking?)
how it'll all come together
and they're sure it will be soon.
there's always tomorrow
(but what if there isn't?)
and there'll be a chance to
make a difference then.

they wonder what our plans are
what we aspire to
and I think why?
their eyes watch as
I fill out those college applications
and scholarship forms
somehow all that I do and have done
it just isn't enough
it will never be enough

but this is what we think.

we say
the world is massive.
why are you urging us to be the ones to change it?
we haven't really found our place in the world yet
we're new at this thing called life.
yes, I want to be a world changer
but can you stop looking at me?
I just stepped out my door
and now
the world is out before me
the largest thing I've ever seen.
I don't know it very well yet
so what makes anyone think i'm ready
or up to changing it?
I barely know what I'm doing
I barely know who I am
much less the world.

we ask
what more do you expect of us?
what will make you happy?
tell me—
I'm dying to know—
what the perfect new adult looks like to you
and once you begin your speech
I will wait for you to stumble
over your elegant description
when you realize this person you're describing
doesn't exist
cannot exist.
you formed an image in your mind
of us being
what you never were.
why do you think we can be perfect
when you could not?
we're all people,
aren't we?

we wonder
how much time do we have
before our chance is gone?
they say we are world changers
but they say nothing about themselves.
are they too old now?
too tied down?
too busy, too involved?
has their chance to make a difference come and gone?
will ours go, too?

they say we are world changers,
but how can we change a world we don't know?
they call us to action
but how can we act before we know what to act on?
there's so much left to see and learn
there's so much left to know
and the pressure is
building building building
nothing we do feels right anymore because
we're so small
nothing's changing
why aren't I making a difference?

oh, my friends.
I've heard it said
(not by me)
and I will say it to you now;
it's okay if you only change one person's world
and it's okay if that person is you.

***

Do you have any thoughts? Have you struggled with all the well meaning questions people ask you? 

When presented with a good, once in a lifetime opportunity, I tend to do one of two things: plow into it with everything I have, or freak out and not take advantage of it.

But since the very reason this summer is special is because it's naturally stress-free, I want to take as much advantage of that as possible.

SO! Whether you're like me and just graduated and have a couple of beautiful months ahead, or whether you're still in high school or long graduated. Here are some ideas to make your summer special.

TRY SOMETHING NEW. The opportunities here are endless. Never been canoeing? Go canoeing. Never ice skated? Ice skate. (it'll feel amazing inside.) This summer, my main "new" thing is bullet journaling. I've been thinking about trying my hand at it for a while now, but I finally took the step and got a dotted journal Thursday night. So far, I'm loving it! I'm hoping to use it as a planner when I go to college.


TAKE ON A NEW PROJECT. And I don't mean something small, though a small project is perfectly fine. But I'm talking large scale here. Have a book you need to write? Write it. Need to deep clean your room, purging all your belongings, going through all your clothes, sorting books and reorganizing, etc.? Do it. And come tell me about it because that's what I'm in the midst of right now. I made a list in my bullet journal for the different parts of my room I need to tackle. Having little boxes to check off my list makes the massive project seem much more manageable!


TAKE ON AN OLD PROJECT. Maybe you have been working on a massive project--for five years, and you haven't really gotten anywhere. Now's a good a time as ever--better, actually--to rededicate yourself and give another go at it. Maybe it's a book you want to write or edit, or maybe it's a massive classic novel you've been meaning to read, or a scrap book or musical piece you've been wanting to learn to play.


CHALLENGE YOURSELF. I guess this can apply to all three suggestions above. Find something to push yourself. You've got time: take advantage of it. You might think you're too busy, but trust me. You have more time than you think. I've been reading This Changes Everything by Jaquelle Crowe, and the chapter I read yesterday talked about the different spiritual disciplines God commands of us. That really got me driven and inspired to put some of those into practice in my life. I memorized Psalm 119:11 last year, but I didn't really take the application to heart. This summer especially, but for the rest of my life, I want to be more dedicated to scripture memory, as well as reading and praying daily. As she says, these things are not just commanded of us, but they're done out of joy. And my heart is eager to serve Him!

I hope this post might have gotten your gears turning, or at least made you think about the summer ahead for you! I'm also doing Camp Nano in July, and I'm going to write another creepy middle grade novel. I'm super pumped about it. It's got forests and monsters and all that fun stuff. I can't wait to write a first draft again!

Do you have any summer plans? Any books you want to read? Write? Are you doing Camp Nano in July? Do you have any big projects you want/need to undertake?

Oh goodness. Where to even begin?

I know I promised poems but guys it's 1:45 a. m. and I PROBABLY NEED SLEEP but that's okay hahahaha who needs sleep anyway and WOW THIS IS ACUTALLY THE STORY OF MY LIFE?

Motto for this quarter: SLEEP IS FOR THE WEAK.

(That's it. I'll give you guys Mottos for every section. LOOK AT ME, BEING A SPONTANEOUS CUPCAKE NOW YOU'LL NEVER KNOW WHAT TO EXPECT FROM ME MWAHAHAHA.)

I am also being hit with the realization that there's a reason most people don't blog at 1:45 in the morning.

Anyway. In all seriousness, the past three months have been C R A Z Y busy. So much has happened, I don't even know how to condense it! But I shall try, with the big highlights.

* I volunteered at my local library (which I've wanted to do for ages)

* I went to Minneapolis, Minnesota for a 3-day writing workshop and I got to be with ALL THE FRENS and it was wonderful. (A full-out blog post will be coming soon for that)

* I spent a week at my childhood bible camp as staff-in-training and was the official camp photographer, which was a fun experience.

* I am on the swim team for my fourth (or fifth?) year in a row (which might sound nice but it actually means getting up stupid early and going to the pool and trying not to drown for an hour and thirty minutes for four days out of the week. SO FUN.)

* I went on a mini mission trip to Kentucky (mentioned in previous post)

My summer still holds two more big trips for me, which I am excited to take. I'm also having to do collegey stuff, which is exciting and scary and nerve wracking.


MOTTO: Everything has their ups and downs.

Writing this past quarter was tricky. I felt like I was trying to pry the tusks off a walrus for half the time, and then the other half was a pleasant stroll through the meadow picking daisies. There was no in-between.

And yes, The Dream Walkers is my angel child. But, as my motto that I totally just made up on the spot at 1:56 in the morning which means it is abosulte gold and you should live by it for the rest of your life says, everything in life has its ups and its downs.

I've had some great moments with DW. I have an awesome new critique partner (*waves*) that has been super encouraging and helped me look at new angles. My lovely cousin read almost half the first draft and swarmed me with encouraging notes which were mostly just rabid fangirling. What more can a writer ask for?

And for the past 15 days, I've been writing on my nano project. You'll have to wait till next week to hear more about that though. Stay tuned!


MOTTO: Sometimes, the brain doesn't go.

I thought about ignoring this section, but I opted against it.

To explain: I haven't been reading much at all. I really want a super good book that will sweep me off my feet, but either I just haven't found one yet (that I haven't read) or something's wrong with me. I am determined to get more reading done though. I WILL READ THE WORDS. I must. My heart longs for them.

I did get a bunch of books at the MYWW though, including a lovely book of poetry by the amazing Caroline Meek and her friend, Skylar Barnes. You should definitely check it out. It's so heart warming and touching.

I also read Book of a Thousand Days (*screams*) and Real Friends, both written (and signed!!!) by Shannon Hale. (I am totally abusing the liberty of parenthetical usage in this post and i am not even  really sorry) Both were absolutely stunning, and you can read my reviews for them on Goodreads and Instagram!

Speaking of which: I got a bookstagram! I am really enjoying it. It does take a good deal of time to snap artsy photos of books, but it's a nice break for me during the day to go to my room and make visual art with books and symbolic items. I really enjoy it, and it's so worth the 20-25 minutes it usually takes. Come check it out and say hi! (the photo graphic for this post is my latest insta photo, if you're wondering what kind of pictures I'm taking)


MOTTO: Quality music can be found in the must unexpected places.

Okay so I have BODYGUARD to thank for this quarter's new music discovery.

...are you ready for it?


...


...*drum roll*...



Animal documentary soundtracks. 

THINK ABOUT IT. DOESN'T IT MAKE SENSE? I'm still reeling from this discovery. The Planet Earth soundtrack? GORGEOUS. Racer Snakes vs Iguanas sounds like it's from Lord of the Rings. It specifically reminded me of when Frodo almost gets eaten by the giant spider in the third movie. BEAUTIFUL MUSIC. Chinstrap penguins is a great one too.

THANK YOU, BODYGUARD! *high fives*

As for regular music, I am currently listening to True Colors from the Trolls movie on repeat. It's such a beautiful sonngggggg. *flops* and the movie is SO GOOD. YOU NEED TO GO WATCH IT RIGHT NOW.


MOTTO: Do not fear change.

Well, I mean ... I think this one's pretty obvious.

I learned several things about myself in updating Stan. One being that I stress way too much over small things, two being I am rarely pleased with anything, and three being when I am pleased with something, I get very giddy and hyper. Hence, the long rambly post because I AM ACTUALLY HAPPY WITH MY NEW UPDATE.

Also, I literally just realized that Stan reached 100 followers. *dances and hurls lots of coffee beans and M&M's* 70 google followers, and 36 email subscribers!

Thank you guys for making this happen! It's super cool and exciting and yeah I'm just a happy squid muffin right now *beams*


And now, for everyone's favorite ...


MOTTO: Be on the lookout for what you wish to find.

I didn't learn as many fun facts as I'd like this quarter, BUT in an intense game of Skittles with my cousins, somehow the topic of Polish holidays came up. On further research, I learned that many Polish celebrate Epiphany, which takes place on January 6th. It's kind of like Christmas, in that they celebrate the three wise men that visited baby Jesus. So, reminiscent of Christmas, but ... not. (although Polish do celebrate Christmas.)

There are parades and lots of candy and small treats. Just another reason everyone should pack up right now and go to Poland. Actually you'd have to wait six months before the holiday wouldn't that be a shame to spend six months in Poland.


This has been quite lengthy, but I hope you enjoyed! I'll be back next week with a Nano-related post, and then I'll give you ALL THE STORIES from this years writing workshop.


Please, talk to me! Do you like Stan's new design? Has your summer been busy or relaxed? Have you gotten much writing done? Are you doing nano? If so, how are you doing so far? Do you have a fun fact to share? 

Dare to dream.

Take a deep breath and do it. Choose to follow your heart. Choose to do what you love. It doesn't mean abandoning college or "stable" jobs. What you love could very well fall under those categories.

But don't push yourself into categories just so you can have a "chance" or "be successful".

What does successful mean, anyway? In my eyes, being successful is finding your purpose in life. It's finding the path God wants you to walk, and going forth boldly.

I'll end with a verse I found the other day.

So we will boldly say:
"The LORD is my Helper;
I will not fear.
What can man do to me?"
Hebrews 13:6

If it's God's plan for you, no power on earth can stop it.

Follow your dreams, and make them real. It will be hard, and it's not going to be all romantic like in the movies. Life isn't butterflies and daisies.

But there are butterflies and daisies. So find them when you can.

If that made any sense. I probably just incoherently rambled.

This has been episode 34 of Late Night Chats with Hannah. Stay tuned!

Also, you should go check out the post Katie did on this a while back on her blog. It's really beautiful. <3

Have you seen La La Land? What did you think of it? What's your dream?

It's okay to not meet a goal.

Goals are there to encourage you. When you don't meet a goal, beating yourself up about it totally defeats the purpose. You likely got a lot accomplished anyway, or at least something. And chances are nothing would have gotten done if you hadn't set a bar for yourself. Hadn't raised a standard to reach for.

It's okay to not feel so great.

You can't really control how you feel. You can choose to think about certain things, and you can choose to change your mindset, which often impacts how you feel. But you can't control every little feeling you have.

And it's okay not to feel great. It's okay to be down. It's okay to be sad. It's okay to be discouraged and disheartened.

The important thing is to remember that you will make it through. We are warriors, and we will fight our way through this life. We will be champions together.

It's okay to not have it all down. 

With my writing, I'm not really sure on some details. I don't know exactly how the Climax of Act Two and Three are going to happen. I'm not sure where my Dark Night of the Soul is going to take place. I'm not sure what my Midpoint even is.

And that's okay.

Writing is about exploring and discovering. So write. Write, even if you're not sure what you're doing. Write, even though the words are rough and you're kind of lost. It's okay to be a little confused.

It's okay to give up.

I don't mean you should abandon everything right now. I mean it's okay to give up a goal. It's okay to give up a deadline if you need more time, or have to move on to another project.

"Give up" tends to carry bad connotations with it. In reality, it's much the same as "letting go" which is very important and very necessary to just about every part of life. You can't live clinging to everything around you. You have to detach yourself a bit sometimes. You have to put up a line and say, "I can't take on anymore." Don't stretch yourself too thin. Give yourself some grace.

If you haven't met your nano goal, take a deep breath.

It's okay. You'll get there eventually.

If you don't know what's going to happen next in your story, take a deep breath.

It's okay. You can brainstorm your way through it.

If you don't think you can take on another project, take a deep breath.

It's okay. You can say no to people. You need to say no to people. It's hard, but it's better to give a few people your all instead of giving a dozen people just an exhausted smidge.

Take a deep breath and give youself some grace.

It's okay. 

Did you survive this month of Camp Nano? Nano-er or not, how did writing go for you this month? Do you need to give yourself some grace?

this is what the weather has looked like this year

Translation: there's been a lot of stress in life and I've been writhing in the agony of it. Really struggling to trust God and His omnipotent hand.

I took the ACT for the first time back in February. That was the main source of stress. I'm actually taking it again in about a week from now. *faint laugh* *falls over dead*

This blog has much word. 

Most of them do not make sense. 

But I still attempt.

(I did this last year, with What I've Learned from Five Years of Writing and thought I'd keep up the tradition.)

*WARNING: you will get some sentimental photos in this post. Brace yourself XP

And this first point will go to the "unfortunately" in my "that's not how it works".


Think about how boring it would be if when people started writing, they were all complete bosses at it.

Just think about it. It's one of those things that you kind of roll your eyes at and say, "I know, I know, it wouldn't be so great." But really think about it.

Everyone has to start somewhere. And when you start a brand new thing, it only makes sense to start at rock bottom. And then you work and grow into a beautiful seasoned writer.

And you keep working, and keep growing.

And I think that's one of the most beautiful parts of writing.

We've moved past binders, but here's a photo of my cousin and me when we were eleven, holding our books.

*happy sigh* we were so little.

Meaning, it's okay if you don't rip out 5k words every day and get your 90k word drafts finished in a month, and get that thing whipped into pristine shape in three months and off to beta readers right after, and have it all polished and ready for publication before the year is up.

That's ... unrealistic. Maybe not for some people *pokes those select few and checks pulses for proof of humanity* but for the general public, writing just doesn't happen that quickly. It takes time.

And that's okay.

Maybe someday when you're published and writing is how you make your living, you'll be able to write that fast. You'll be able to write and publish a book every year.

But you will be able to write that fast because it will be your job. You won't have school or other work. You will have loads more time to dedicate to writing.

But right now, if you're not writing for a living ... you've got either school or work. And that takes time. I've been writing for six years now, and I've written ... five complete first drafts. (one of them co-written)

And ... I haven't gotten any one of those into reading shape.

Which leads to number three.

It's unfair to try to make yourself accomplish as much as a published, writing-for-a-living author. Both to you, and to them. This is what they do for a living. Of course they're going to write more than you!

It took a lot of work and discipline in order for them to get where they are today. Why should you be an exception to that?

Sometimes we have these expectations lurking in the back of our minds. And it makes us insecure in our writing because we're "failing" in all these areas that we feel we should be excelling in. And if you feel bad/insecure about your writing, sit back and try to figure out why you feel that way. Are you wasting time you could be using writing by playing on your phone? Okay, maybe you could work on that one. Are you berating yourself for not having the book you started a year ago off to beta readers? Give yourself a break. Think about why you feel that way. If you're doing your best with the time you have, THAT IS ALL YOU CAN DO. Don't beat yourself up if you're not meeting expectations that you cannot reach.

Figure out what you can do with the time you have, and make the most of it. You'll have a lot more peace in your writing.


You might be squinting right now thinking, "...yeah? Is this supposed to surprise me?"

I don't know how I got this mindset. Back in the early days, I guess I read too many blog posts warning authors not to "preach" when they try to get their theme across. And that just drummed into my mind, "DON'T THINK OF ANY THEMES. DON'T ADD THEM IN. YOU DON'T WANT TO SCARE ANYONE AWAY." And it bothered me for an embarrassingly long time.

But now that I've been reading blogs and craft books for a while, I realize that was a really silly mindset for me to have taken on. Themes are not a bad thing. They are what make your story special. They are what give your book true meaning.

They are what impact readers.

And yes, you don't want to preach. I still try to avoid putting names to my themes, but there are some that I'm aware of and look for ways to incorperate. Like loneliness and sibling-friendships and self worth.

Themes are beautiful. So embrace them, and don't be ashamed of them!

(sentimental photo of me flipping through my first book, back in the old days)

STORY TIME!

Okay, so when I was ... thirteen? I think I was thirteen ... Anyway, when I was thirteen, my mom asked me to read my book aloud during our read aloud time.

*cue gasps of horror*

I know, I know. Every writer's worst night mare, right? At least it was for me.

I freaked. out.

I printed out my prologue and first chapter and smoothed it out and took deep breaths, but when I sat in there to read, with everyone waiting and listening ...

I could not utter a single word.

I just burst into tears.

That created a looooot of problems for me in the future which I will not go into right now, but the point I want to make is it is okay to say no to people. Even people who are close to you. People whose opinions you value.

You know when your story is ready to be read. Don't push yourself past that. Just explain to the person in question that it's just a first draft and not ready to be read/going through lots of edits at the moment and you're not comfortable handing it out to anyone yet/etc. There will come a time to share, and you will have to grit your teeth and push yourself to hand those chapters over.

But let yourself have time to give something you're proud of. Something that you've worked hard on. In that way, if they're critiquing it, you'll get feedback you need, too. It won't be stuff you're already aware of but have yet to fix.

I might be smiling here, but should anyone try to read my work I would shriek and hiss.

Which leads to point six.


This past year, when I won a contest and got to send the first three chapters of my manuscript to HarperCollins for a critique, I spent a whole month doing almost nothing but editing, desperately trying to whip my chapters into shape to meet that creeping deadline (there's a reason 'deadline' begins with 'dead'). And once I sent those chapters to the editor, my family attacked in full force.

"This means we get to read it now, right?"

"If you can send it to a professional editor up in New York, you can give it to us."

I pretty much had no choice but to hand it over. But at that point, it wasn't that hard to let it go. I had that whole month to mentally prepare myself (I figured my family would finally make me hand over my work) and I had worked really hard on editing these chapters.

In short, I had something I was proud of.

I'm not saying those chapters were perfect. And the feedback from the editor gave me a lot to think about, and a lot of stuff to work on.

But those chapters were some of the best writing of which I was capable at that time. If I look back at them now, I can probably make changes and make it better. But it's been several months. Of course I can make it better.

I've grown since then.

My advice would be to write something you can polish and be proud of. It'll be hard to let go of it, and scary. But it has to happen eventually.

Plus, your family will stop bugging you (save to ask for more).


I hope this post encouraged/enlightened you! I've learned loads more than this, of course, but that's what Stan is for, is it not?


What have you learned from writing? 

There's a lot of "just doing it" involved in blogging.

"I don't know what to post about next week. Maybe I'll write about vulnerability ...?" *Friday comes* "Um...." then you gotta JUST DO IT.

(also, no. i am not promoting Nike.)

But I'm serious. A lot of the time, I'll have a post and it's midnight on Friday and I need to sleep, but I just don't feel like posting it cause what if it's not good? What if I'm not coherent? What if people think these brain thoughts of mine are just silly and stupid?

You just gotta do it. And what happens, happens. And that's life for you.



This was a big "guideline" that I knew in a subconscious sort of way before I started blogging. I knew that if I wanted blogging to go well for me, I needed to set a schedule and stick with it. Otherwise, all order would collapse and I would get nothing done and never post and Stan would remain a tiny little creature and no one would ever come by.

Which might not have happened to that extent, but I would not have just reached 10k page views *goofy grin* and I would not have 88 followers.

Stan's been growing slow, but steady. And I think keeping a consistent posting schedule has really helped with that.


The best posts I write are usually written in a single sitting the day before I need to post.

I like to ponder what I'll write about during the week, and when Friday night comes I'll sit down, crack my knuckles, and get to work. It usually takes me ... an hourish? I think? *should time myself sometime* If I've been pondering it all week, it comes easier. Then it's just getting a cover photo together.


In terms of building an audience, I would suggest ....

If you're a blogger, do not be shy about commenting on blogs. That's how we know you're reading, and that you even exist! So all the comments help.




This ties back into the "just doing it" aspect of blogging. Blogging is an art form in itself, and art isn't supposed to be perfect. You have typos? That's okay. You have a few grammatical errors? Fine. Some analogies that are limp as wilted lettuce? Let it go.

Which leads to my last bit of advice to you guys.


Just like you have to let go of your story, let go of each and every blog post you put up. Once you hit that publish button, it's out in the world. There's no taking it back. It's gone - bye bye. Which means it isn't yours anymore. Not really. In all likelihood, every person who reads it will take something from it differently than the other. Some meanings they derive may be ones you didn't even intend to incorporate.

But such is the beautiful, slightly messy way of art.


And I lied. I have one more point.

Back when I first started, I was kind of insecure. I didn't know if I really had anything to contribute to the blogosphere. There are lots of other bloggers out there who are much wiser and more experienced than myself. What could I possibly have to offer?

It took me some time to discover what kind of posts hold my heart, and what the bulk of what I say here on Stan would be about. Encouragement rather than techy stuff. And that's okay. Encouragement is amazing, and so is the techy stuff. They're all good.

You have to find what you love and enjoy and embrace it. Don't feel bad about it since you might be different than others. Differences are good. Embrace them!


I hope you enjoyed this post! I'm sorry I can't do a cool give away or something, but ... I'm poor. So just accept my love and hugs and coffee *passes out cocoa and coffee and chocolate*

Are you a blogger? What have you learned from it? If you're not a blogger, are there any aspects of blogging that you can take away for your writing? 

Everyone knows something that only they know.

Maybe it's something small. Maybe it's that your sister likes her peanut butter and strawberry jelly sandwiches cut in triangles and won't eat them in squares. Maybe it's that she doesn't like them at all. Maybe you know that if you flick your ear, you'll laugh.

And maybe it's something bigger. Admittedly, the bigger your knowledge is, the more likely someone else knows it too. Maybe you discovered a way to make coffee strong, but without actually using as much coffee. Maybe you wrote a song that brings your mother to tears each and every time she hears it.

You know things. And some things you know really well, like how to do a back flip or play guitar.

Because every person is different.

Isn't that cool? *cue the geek-out moment*

Let's all just think about that for a second. Think about how many people there are in the world. As if there aren't a TON in the world right this second, there have been billions and trillions of people in the past.

Yet we are all, each and every one of us, different. And we all know different things, some that only we are aware of.

Isn't that just ... cool?

Where am I going with this?

Well.

Aside from this being just a super DUPER cool fact, I am here to announce something to you today. People are different and know things, and writers are the same way. We writers know tricks and secrets to this craft we have embraced and are striving to perfect.

And there's not a lot of stuff that only you'll know and no one else will. (you know what your main character would do if a flying antelope asked her to climb trees and eat star fruits, but that's not super relevant for other writers)

But maybe there's an area of writing/art that you specifically enjoy. One that you thrive in. Maybe you're super amazing with character backstories or motives. Maybe you love world building (*cheers on all my fellow worldbuilders*) Or maybe you have a bit of encouragement to offer the world when it comes to writing. Encouragement that isn't really out there.

It's time to share it.

Whether you have a blog or not, it doesn't matter. You have an opportunity to share what you know and love with other writers all over the world, and help each other grow.

It's called Project Canvas.

ISN'T IT JUST BEAUTIFUL???? *swoons*

Ehem. *is professional again*

This is a project that my lovely fren Caroline Meek created. I met Caroline at the Minneapolis Young Writers Workshop last year, and she is a fantastic and creative and inspiring human and I am so excited and honored to be working with her! And you can too.

It's so simple. You pick a topic from the topics page on the website and email Caroline or Olivia about it. Then you write a one to three page article (basically a blog post.) and submit it to them, along with your bio.

It's so simple and easy. And it's a great way to get your name into the writing community.



I wrote an article for this called, What Does it Mean to be a Writer? and it is so close to my heart. It's something I wrestled with for several years and is surprisingly absent from the writing world. I don't see many articles about it. But I know everyone, at some point, doubts themselves, and wonders if they really have what it takes to be a writer. If they even are a writer at all.

I address it in this book, and I'll also give you some thoughts on world building (not sure what area I'm going to write about yet). So please get involved with this book! I wrote a message I want people to hear, and I don't want you guys to miss it. And, what's more, I want to hear what you have to say about your writing experiences.

Having doubts? Please don't.

Do you think you don't have anything to offer us? Any advice to share, any wisdom to contribute?

Well, sorry but ...

You're wrong.

You know something about this writing thing we do. Maybe you know how it feels never to finish a book and have encouragement to offer in that area. Maybe you know what it feels like to be alone in your writing, and have advice for people struggling with the same thing.

Or maybe it's something factual. Maybe you're a pro at backstories and have a formula you've developed that makes the whole process smoother and more efficient. *looks at a certain cousin of mine* Maybe you found a simple way to make maps and want to show other writers.

It can be anything. (writing related, of course.) You have knowledge and wisdom.

Will you join us?

I was pondering what I should write about today, and after starting several posts and losing my train of thought/drinking tea/scribbling random things in journal/trying to find a word to play against my dad in Lexulous/why, what an amazing world this is we live in/what do you think souls are made of?/if we didn't need to breathe do you think we could and would live underwater?/what if our eyes were on our elbows?/and how about I go get some popcorn and coffee at 2 A. M. because that's a wonderful idea.

Ehem.

...what was I talking about?

OH LOOK LEGOS LET'S GO PLAY WITH THEM FOR FIVE HOURS

*actually procrastinated for an embarrassing amount of time while "trying to find a cover picture" for this post*

Do you struggle with sudden bouts of opera singing? Do you grapple with the ever present pull of Pinterest, or the jaws of Tumblr? (I don't actually have a tumblr but I hear it's highly addictive.) Do you find your concentration and determination slipping at the sight of a good book, your will power crumbling at the faintest whiff of fresh coffee being brewed, which reminds you that you need to go and get a mug of it before it gets cold and-oh look, the piano. You really need to practice ... and oh look, a flower. Let's go outside and frolic in the green for a couple of hours and ponder the deep questions of life and existence and humanity.

Procrastination is a problem for ... dare I say everyone? Let's be safe and say most people - cause everyone is different and some strange beans out there might have the ability to stay on track always because they have lots of self control which I don't understand but THAT'S AWESOME and I'm jelly. A jelly dohnut.

And these, ladies and gentlemen, are what my thought trains look like.

Now that you've read a very procrastination-y intro, I will deliver to you my usual prime quality and top notch blog post, this one on procrastination.

*snaps into productivity mode*

There are ways you can fight procrastination, and it might not be as hard as you think. The first one I've already given to you.

This is very important. If you want to get stuff done, you have to sit down and say, "I'm going to get stuff done today." I don't know about you, but it's very easy for me to get distracted. I could spend an hour staring at the wall or sprawled out on the floor staring at the ceiling and thinking. My thoughts are so loud, I am deceived into thinking that I'm actually doing something or talking to someone, when really I'm just sitting there. Staring. And doing absolutely nothing.

But if I've told myself, "Alright, Hannah. You're going to sit here and write this blog post." Then part of my mind clings to that task. When I do get distracted looking for a cover photo and trailing off to look at possible cover pictures for my third book, that part of my brain tugs me back and says, "Remember, you're supposed to be writing a blog post. And you want to edit tonight too, and you have to go to bed at a sane hour so you really need to get this done."

It's much easier to stay on task when that little voice is in there reminding you. But that voice will only come if you put it there in the first place, by thinking through what you want to accomplish.

Otherwise, what do you have to get distracted from?


You can't get distracted by what you don't have. If it's something online, put your phone on airplane mode or turn your wi-fi off. If you have your music online, then just close the browser. To keep me on track one time, I pulled up a picture of a scary looking Gandalf captioned, YOU SHOULD BE WRITING. WHY ARE YOU NOT WRITING. so that every time I pulled up Pinterest I saw that instead of enticing pictures of pretty pathways and intriguing settings.

It worked.

But don't deny yourself of procrastination completely. Instead,

If you sat down to write a chapter, and you write a chapter with lots of spare time, reward yourself. Don't say, "Oh well now I can write A WHOLE OTHER CHAPTER LET'S DO IT." That'll just wear you out. Instead, let yourself get on Pinterest for a bit. Set a timer so it stays a reward and doesn't turn into procrastination.

This kind of ties back to the first point I made.

Right now, I'm writing this post. But I'm also hiding from my WIP cause I'm not sure what's going to happen. Rather than keep hiding, however, I will sit down after I'm done here and get my notebook and think things through and write it out. I get so much done when I know where I'm going with the scene and what needs to happen to get there.

But there's a flipside to this one.


Say you don't know how the scene is going to go. Yes, that's going to make it harder, but that doesn't mean you should just pout and go burn eight hours on Pinterest. Write anyway. It doesn't have to be perfect. It can't be perfect. It can only be really, really good, and that comes after a lot of drafts when you probably won't be having this particular issue anyway.

Just write it out.


Every bean is different. Thus, every bean has different weaknesses and strengths. Find your weaknesses so you can be wary of them, and work on them. And find your strengths so you can take advantage of them.

If procrastination is something you struggle with, find different ways to treat yourself. Ways that work best for you. Writing is such a deeply personal thing. Find your groove, your style. Find yourself in what you love to do, and strengthen it.



I hope this gave you some ideas for how to beat the procrastination bug. Further prescriptions to various diagnoses may come in the future, but due to the spontaneity of the writer, they cannot be promised. You might get a post on Holding onto Your Story next week, or you might get a post about wombats.

We'll see.

Do you struggle with staying on the task at hand? What are some tricks/tips you've learned that help?

Last January was when I finally started to study the bible for myself. It took some time to find a rythym of how studying the bible really worked for me, but every step of the process brought insight, development, and growth. I am not the person who started this year. I am much older, deeper, and I'd like to think wiser. And I definitely know God on a deeper level than ever before.



I started draft two of The Thief's Conspiracy in February and I still haven't finished it. It's taken me so long to make progress, in part because this is a new step for me in my writing journey. And it's still taking me a lot of time to understand that editing is not a fast process like first drafting. It takes time, and it is agonizing.


I also started a blog last February. And in doing that, I've realized just how much I enjoy it. It's a way for me to sort out my thoughts and share what I have learned with you all. And I am so glad I started it. The whole blogging community is amazing.



Growing takes a lot of time. A lot of things take a lot of time.


Which might sound kind of insulting at first, and rather dismal, but is actually a really good thing. Imagine if the world really was all about you? Every little flaw you had would be magnified, every mistake you made like a declaration of war in its importance. You couldn't rest!

Problems that chew you up and spit you out, that grind on your every waking thought, often lose their deathly, crushing hold once you step back and realize that life really isn't all centered around you. Other people exist, too. And a big part of our life here on earth is to help others.

Once you step back and appreciate that the world is bigger, that you are small, the problems that seemed so big before dwindle. Your priorities might become reorganized.


There are a lot of lies that I struggled with this year. Lies I believed about myself, about others, about what others thought of me, etc. And I knew a lot of them were lies. But still, I couldn't overcome them.

It's so much bigger than that though. These aren't things you just "get over". You have to learn why they're there and figure out the truth to them. Realizing a lie is a lie just isn't good enough. Until you've gotten a hold of the firm, solid, undeniable truth, the lies slip and lose their hold.


My best friend moved 1,652 miles away back in March. Half my closest friends live states away from me. Most of my childhood friends left for college in August. The distance makes things harder, certainly, but not impossible. Relationships may change, but you can still grow through it. Don't give up your long distance friends. They're golden.





(good luck making sense of this one)

For some reason, I had it in my little brain that most of my writer friends suddenly didn't like me very much at all, and that I was an annoying nuisance (in essence). I'm really not sure where these thoughts and fears came from, but when my writer friends surprised me with a laptop, I couldn't exactly hold to those beliefs.

Just because you think/feel something doesn't mean it's the truth.


Before the workshop in June, I wasn't sure if I really stood a chance at being an author. I wasn't even sure if I was good enough. But the authors there all believed in us. You could see it in every class, every panel, every keynote. They believed in us. They knew we could do it, that we had what it takes.

I learned that I'm not actually bad at writing. I've still got a long way to go, but I've already come really far. Which leads to number ...


It takes time. It takes growth. Every single step and stage has something to offer, some lesson to teach you. Stop concentrating on what you don't have and look for what you do, and what you can learn.

This is a theme I've seen in this post so far that's going to get ZERO editing because I'm writing it at 1 A.M. Friday night with burning eyes and sleep calling my name so it must be a good point

This day and age is so rushed. We don't know how much time we have here, after all. How can we stand to wait? But growth takes time. And life is all about growing and changing and learning and discovering. But these things take time. Remember that.


Prayer gives you perspective.


I don't know about you guys, but that's when I feel most alone. Not at home in my room at night. When I'm at Church or a devo, surrounded by my peers with people who are only kind of my friends. It's okay to feel alone when surrounded by people. Just make sure you have real friends out there, even if they're a thousand miles away.


Don't let things just happen by accident. Don't just go about accidentally doing things. Do things. Mean things. Think about stuff. Don't be afraid to explore. Don't hold back. We've only got so much time, after all. And things take time. So be bold and decide what you want to do and who you want to be.

You will become the person you want and strive to be, after all. Make sure that person is the right one.


And the last thing I will share with you today, the last lesson on my list is this.


Life is all about heart. Where is your heart?

It doesn't matter what you do. It doesn't matter how bad or how good you are. It doesn't matter if you helped the old lady with her groceries or treated your siblings nicely.

What matters is where your heart is.

Because once you get your heart in the right place, then these things will be the obvious course of action. Before getting your heart right, these actions are pointless and empty. When you get your heart in the right place, doing the right thing will become a part of you. And when you mess up, it's okay. Because you still tried to do the right thing.


There's so much more I want to say. But that's what Stan here is for, right? XP I'll be back again next week to blab. But I hope you enjoyed this post!

What did you learn this year?