Why?

But how can this be? It was so beautiful. So perfect. So exciting.

So when I see this mess I've created, I get frustrated and annoyed. I throw up my hands thinking, "What happened?" 

I wrote it. That’s what happened.

For a long time, I didn’t understand that. I didn’t understand that simply ‘writing’ it was the problem. So I came up with new ideas, 'better' ideas, that I thought would solve the brain puke issue. I thought these brilliant new ideas would clean up the mess I’d made before. That if I just did it a different way, then finally it would be good.

But these new ideas lived and fluttered in the garden of my brain, too. They, just like the ones before them, were magical, ethereal, otherworldly beings. They were butterflies. So the same thing happened as before: when I put them on the page, they died.

And so this went on repeat. Again and again. Every time, that new idea becomes so enticing. The little butterfly dances right in your peripheral as you type, its beautiful wings catching the light and tempting you to ditch what you’re working on and go for the new, pretty butterfly instead.

Do you get what I'm saying here? Do you see the problem?

We don't give ourselves, or our ideas, a chance. We puke them out on the page, and when we read them it's like ... What is this? What was I thinking? This is terrible!

Of course it's terrible. You haven't even edited it yet! It's puke!

Every idea you come up with has its own set of problems. Its own set of plot holes. Its own issues you'll have to work out in the next draft.

So what's the answer? What's the answer to this butterfly problem?

The thing about butterflies is that they can almost always be saved. Once you pin a butterfly, you just have to be gentle and patient. You need a lot of pins, sometimes. A lot of light, a lot of patience, and a lot of time.

Your ideas, your delicate butterflies, are still beautiful. They just need some work. It's such a sad thing to see our ideas - beautiful, flawless bits of our imagination - plucked from our brain and pinned on the page. But that's life, guys. That's what we have to do if we want to share our creations with the world.

Let me give you a word of advice on this. When that idea you were so excited about just doesn't seem the same on the page, don't give up on it. It still has that potential. If you can, try to remember the beauty you saw in it, when it was just you and the butterfly-idea floating in your brain-garden.

Don't give up on your ideas. You just have to give them a chance. Some ideas will fail. They'll turn out not to fit with the story. But always try to give them a chance, unless you're positive it's not going to work out. They're a whole different thing once edited. Give them that chance to shine beyond the first draft.

It will never be the same as when they floated free in you head, but with a lot of time and effort, your enchanting, magical ideas can become beautiful again.


I wholly acknowledge this post was slightly sad (and a little morbid). I will try to plan a happier post for next week! XP Maybe I'll talk about rabbit trails and cute, fluffy bunnies. *nods to self and goes to plan next post*